oops... my hands are so itchy.. so i changed my layout again.. hurm... can somehow reflect how one is thinking eh.. after exams will expand on this webby.. link it to my homepage soon.. hee.. quite fun la.. to jus sit in front of the comp and figure out writing codes for websites..

a few more days to the start of exams and i don really feel anxious or least bit worried about it.. rather contrasting to the previous semester when i was busy mugging for it a week and a half before the exams.. can's explain this phenomenom but hopes things get better.. the lazy worms infesting my physical and mental being must be rid of asap.. immediately in fact.. hur~

went to expo for the mph book fair last saturday evening.. walked around quite abit most of the time head hung low.. (cos the books were all piled on the floor).. looking for books that catch my attention.. this year's stock was reduced.. not many books to search from.. bought 6 books costing me $30 bucks.. will haf a good time reading them man.. the book i'm currently reading the favours and fortunes of katie castle is 1 of the 6 i bought.. *smilez*

...pms is a good avenue to blame many things on.. temperamental, mood swings, laziness, procrastination, wateva u name it, they can be due to pms.. but it comes to a point where a line has to be drawn for taking pms for granted.. if there indeed exist present and post menstrual syndrome other than the proven pre menstrual syndrome, go ahead and claim that my outburst or abnormality of personality is the consequence of pms.. you save a dollar each day, u get a substantial amt in the future.. you travel a metre everyday, u'd cover a mile in time.. you collect each grain of sand and u get a heap of sand soon.. you tolerate something or someone.. u erupt with anger when things prolong or get out of hands..

even if the time of eruption may be caused by 'nature', it still erupted.. before blaming on other things or ppl.. why not count the number of times history repeated itself? if it wasn't a repeated doing, would it even haf erupted the last time when it was not personal faults? true, you can be used to the procrastination and abnormal punctuality.. but it does not mean you can take it for granted.. many times the urge of leaving or even slapping you rises.. but of cos i think it wasn't right to do so.. suppressed frustration can be fatal.. in the sense that trust can be lost.. i just dunno when.. obviously i don wish that to happen..

ranting to other ppl can assist in cooling myself down when impatience got the better of me during the waiting time (that includes vulgarities in addresses).. so i did.. i wouldn't want a burst blood vessel jus cos of waiting for you.. it wasn't the first time i ranted to him.. but it was the first time after a long long long time.. when i was waiting at the bstp.. i was thinking u could haf at least told me u gg to bathe, or u jus bathed.. or u haven leave house instead of leaving me to rush out since i was 15mins late only to end up waitiing for half hr b4 u said u were jus leaving house after i miss call u twice.. come to think of it.. i was glad i overslept on one of the days when we wanted to go study.. call me selfish or wat.. i really dunno how i'd haf reacted if i reached harbor front on time.. or earlier..

as for saturday.. i told ya if u don wan to go i'd go with my cousin.. like i said it may not be totally ur fault but i was pissed cos i could've asked my cousin along if this should happen. since u decide to go, my cousin said i'd haf company, she'll go on sunday.. end up i went alone to expo to buy my books.. plus i was damn tired.. din really sleep as well so i din think it was a gd excuse.. to say you want to meet and then not turning up except to come after i've bought the books.. u think one sorry can clear all stuff? hurm.. like i said, if it was the first time things happen, i wun be so angry.. jus tot i should say it all out..

it really isn't good feeling to haf to wait for someone.. the same person over and over again.. i can be used to ur laziness but i guess you should wake up ur idea as well.. it should occur to you that if when nobody bothers to be angry with ya that's the end man.. it gets extremely frustrating when ur actions dun speak of ur words.. well, perhaps you adopted the theory 'they are words only'.. i dunno.. i'm on the verge of giving up.. i still haf the strength to help but i jus dunno when i'll giv up.. i guess some things i mention will upset yo i'm seriously not sure.. how can i be sure of anything when you dun even put in the actions to prove it? how can i be sure of anything when i cant even know when you'll be punctual? one of the most basic value.. *shrugs*

i'm not saint, i make mistakes too.. i try to correct them and i mean it.. do you?