pardon me for vulgarities and the occasional spelling errors.. it's definitely a challenge to typr this while i'm crying right after i woke up.. vulgarities aren't meant to be disrespetful in this entry, neither they're direted towards you.. jus an indication of how upset i am..

for those who know, anger-and-upset driven tears plus choice of words plus spices of vulgarities show's severity of situation.. OBVIOUSLY you don't have the fucking knowledge..

i said i apologise for hanging up.. and subsequently jus a few minutes earlier your hanging up helps ALOT. thanks for that man.. you know i dunno what's wrong today but i have to be blamed for being harsh throughout the day.. when there wasn't even a teeny weeny slice of my intention doing so! you just have to assume and feel that i'm harsh towards you.. hello mister, could you have taken it too personally? i admit there're many questions harboring in my brain when i read through draft 1 of your report and thus bringing them up during the discussion.
"So how to expand, increase the number of sentences?" you asked.. i gave you an example for introducing the question asked in the survey and mentioned you shouldn't use the same standard format.. overusing the same 'pattern' makes the reading boring.. so you asked further so how to expand further since can't use the same throughout? and yes i got stuck.. i'm not supposed to be well-versed in you part of the report alright and ok, if you think ONE example and following examples other members given is not enough to struck off your train of thoughts for subsequent ideas, i'll do it then! which i eventually did ask you to send it over and i'll add in the expansion. no problem with this? hah! you see when you are given the responsibility or taken the responsibility in writing that part of the report, you try to improve it with the suggestion of others. sometimes it's up to you own disgression to digest and from there come up with other ideas or sentences in this case. if i have to tell you word for word what to write i might as well do it myself right which i'm gg to do anyhow in my failure to give you MORE eamples. i was trying to tell how weird i feel towards the way you present in draft one and mind you.. i was targeting at the draft.. and you have to assume i was harsh to YOU and so you shut up.. by the way, my "aiyo i wan to 'boot' you" was meant to bring in a lighter note to the heavy discussion.. if you have to think otherwise, i'm sorry.. i was just wondering if you ever put yourself in my shoes.. if you fucking hell try to be the editor of the report you may get what i mean.. you edit and change too much, ppl unhappy, start to think if there's anything wrong with their ability.. this is considered minor in the school cntext.. try doing this in the business world.. let me repeat myself.. I HAVE NO ANY INTENTION WHATSOEVER TO BE HARSH TOWARDS YOU!!!

and if this doesn't help.. so the assumptin here by you is i fucking continue to be harsh during lunch.. you FEEL i was harsh cos of my tone.. okie i apologise once again for SOUNDING harsh to you when i meant what i said to be kidding.. when i asked why are you ignoring me you replied with a what? and gosh you should look into a mirror then.. what kind of attitude are you trying to show me? your 'what?' and a black face justifies you unhappiness but doest it justify how i feel then? so you said you are angry so you shut up.. okie.. and a few minutes ago you are the one to tell me not to shut up when there's a problem.. bring it up and talk about it.. *applause* for you nobility in facing this kind of situations.. another thing.. so you mean when you piss me off and later tried talking to me but i ignore you.. you've already done something and there's NOTHING else you can do? so let me try to decipher.. are you trying to say when you are angry and shut up, i should shut up. then later on you are okie and tried talking to me i should accept it and start talking to you? wow.. now i know how to be a better girlfriend thanks..

have you considered your tone when you pose questions to me during the discussion? well, you said it's the way i deliver my views that i sound harsh.. okie i'll look into that character flaw. and lt me tell you your tone wasn't one of righteousness and responsibility.. gives me the idea that you are not really serious about writing the report.. okie fine.. bizcom isn't a module you like at all and i should brush that off since i'm supposed to KNOW you.. i did brush your attitude off for that matter anyway.. and have i mention this before? wasn't the issue about what happened in the afternoon? why fucking bring what happened in the morning in as well? to justify I AM HARSH TO YOU ACCORDING TO UR ASSUMPTION and mind you.. it's your ASSUMPTION?

'hate' is a very harsh word to use.. let me explain the reason behind my choice.. instead of seeing it as an indication of how mad i was at your attitude, you chose to blame me for being harsh and showing you the attitude.. hey it's your brain and i fucking has no control over it.. so should i apologise for the way your brain thinks? i do apologise in any case and i mean it..

which brings me to another point. what do you mean by "okie lo, like that then it's my fault lo, then what you want me to do? ok, sorry lo".. standing ovation for your courageous apology i must say.. and IT IS THIS THAT HURTS ME THE MOST.. this is not the first time and seems like you haven't register it into your head.. when you don't mean it, say sorry for fuck?

it's a small matter? so you don't want to talk about it anymore? alright.. if you wish.. like i said one word from you and i'll never ever niao you, scold you, appear to be harsh.. though it's a trivial matter it shows alot.. seriously you give me the idea there's no need to reason this out when your assumption is so strong and so wrong..

the notion that i'm harsh towards you the whole of today and that i'm the one who's giving the attitude is very strong.. go ahead and scold me for typing this entry or more importantly publish this entry.. i'm supposed to shut up according to you when you are angry.. or did you mention bringing it up? *confused* am i trying to show everyone you are bad? Bullshit.. it's to show how upset i am feeling right now and dunno how fucking long ahead..

hmmm, i shall let my anger rest with the end of tis entry.. and i shall be happy again. *cross fingers*

this is so ironic, i've never seen such a big contrast between 2 recent posts before.. *shrugs*